Today I shot more photos with Hazel Dean. I think we underestimated how cool and windy it was outside. It definitely made it much more difficult to shoot while we were just trying to keep warm and not blow away. Even still, I think we captured a few interesting shots.

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WAKE UP! I worked last night from 9:30pm until 5:45 this morning, got in bed at 6:15am and awoke 15 minutes later @ 6:30 to get showered and drive to downtown LA to be on-set for my 8am call time. If nothing else, I’m dedicated…

Shooting: National Network commercial for DEGREE with Bear Grylls. I arrived downtown at the location, checked in, got reacquainted with my fellows actors from the fitting a few days ago, jumped into my wardrobe and checked in with the producers and the directing team – The Perlorian Brothers. About 30 minutes after arrived, I have to say, that a strange feeling came over me. Why? Well, I’m a true fan of his show(s), Bear Grylls’ show, and I think he does thingsthat take incredible resolve, faith, skills, etc. Plus, even though, at this point, I hadn’t spoken to him directly he seemed like a super-nice guy…I’m a complete sucker for nice people.

I walked to set to watch them shoot a scene I wasn’t in and to get final approval for my wardrobe. Shortly after that the whole cast and crew drove a short distance to another location where I was to be working. While we were assembling for a rehearsal Bear came over to introduce himself to us. And yes, it’s confirmed, Bear Grylls is one of the nicest, most sincere, people I’ve ever met.

I have to say up that until immediately before the first rehearsal myself and the other actors had no idea what we were doing – nothing. Right before “ACTION!” the producer gave us the instructions of what he wanted. Of course, we did numerous takes and variations of what they were looking for. Something that was, I think, a great sign was that we were rotating 3 different versions of the same product for different territories around the world. Hopefully, that means that there are big plans for this campaign. Shortly afterwards we broke for lunch.

Bear, who definitely could have gone back to his large motor home, opted to, instead, dine with myself and the other actors. I have to say that it was weird to see him eat normal food…on a plate. You have to remember that, prior to this, I’d only seen him eat on his show, MAN vs WILD. On there he eats things like raw, live fish, snakes, caterpillars, etc! I kept thinking that it was probably boring to him to eat like the rest of us. I actually told him that I didn’t think that he ever got cold or uncomfortable in any type of conditions, but there he was; looking for a jacket like the rest of us, “I need a fleece mate!” He said. Great guy and I’m in complete awe of his knowledge and talent as an adventureman.

After lunch we changed into our underwear to brave the chilly temperatures, fake snow…and the freakin’ fog machine…the fog machine! The fog machine about put me down for the count. We finished up and heard, “It’s a wrap on our test subjects!” and got a big applause from the crew. One of the directors, the Perlorian brothers’, approached me to get my email address to make sure I got a copy of the finished product. I don’t think that’s ever happened to me before. With that, I headed back to my tiny room in the trailer to change, return my wardrobe and I was on my way….On my way where? Home. To, hopefully take a nap before going back to my other job. BUT as soon I got almost all of the way home from downtown I realized that I had forgotten to get my wristwatch back fromthe wardrobe assistant. Ahh! So I called to make sure they were still there and drove all the way back downtown to retrieve it. That silly move cost me at least an hour of precious time in my lovely, ultra plush, queen-sized bed with 600 thread-count sheets. Believe it or not, 2-hours later I was due back at my night job. Hey, you gotta do watcha gotta do.

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Audition: “Turbo Tax” @ Ross Lacy Casting. I had to get rescheduled for this because the original it was during the fitting for DEGREE; fortunately it worked out. The audition went really well and my fingers are crossed for a callback! The fitting was cool too and I’m looking forward to a great shoot.

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Good news! It seems that the DEGREE people haven’t changed their mind about me. The talent coordinator and the people from wardrobe have called to set me up for a fitting tomorrow.

I say that because booking the job is only a step to actually getting to shoot the job. I have had that very thing happen on 3 different occasions for 3 different reasons. One was a commercial and two were studios films. Even though it was painful at the time it happened; I look at it as a success in my career. I believe that the more jobs one books, the more likely those things are to occur. It’s earning my strips in the business. So on to the Santa Monica fitting I will go.

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Today I participated in another student script reading project at West Adams High School. These kids wrote some really great stuff and, myself and the other performing had a great time reading it.

In other, great, fitting news on a Monday morning was a call from Alicia, one of my commercial agents. I don’t usually talk directly to my agents unless I stop by the office or its something real important. Most correspondence is through email with the wonderful assistants – Megan & Ariel.

So, the fact that it was a Alicia’s voice get me the feeling that great news was on the horizon. Sure enough, the news was that I booked the DEGREE commercial! I was so happy to get the news. The project run is National network, cable, internet & syndication.

In the “ebb & flow, comes & goes” column I was scheduled to go to producers for THE MENTALIST tomorrow, but it shoots the same day as the commercial. Oh well, I can’t think of a better reason for that to happen. Hopefully, they’ll bring me in on something else and another fitting, deserving actor will get my audition time. The timing of this might be perfect for earning my SAG Pension credit and qualifying for SAG medical insurance for next year. Plus, this commercial looks to be a lot of fun!

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Callback: “Degree” @ Spot Casting. Yes! Callback for DEGREE! I think it went well. On to the next step.

Audition/Tape: “Mad Love” @ CFB Casting. This was a same day call for a few lines on this new CBS multi-camera comedy. My agent wasn’t sure if I would agree to go in on it and told me that she would support whatever I wanted to do. Even though I would much rather go in on something more substantial I’m more than happy to go in on this. So in I went.

When I arrived at the casting office I was told that the sides had changed so I spent 10 minutes or so working on the changes. I think it went pretty good after asking for a rehearsal, but I could tell that I hadn’t read for a multi-camera sitcom in a while. It’s definitely different than single-camera and it’s good that I recognized that.

Good news! My agency called to inform me that I’m on avail for the DEGREE commercial. It seems like forever since I’ve been on avail for anything.

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Today I went to a photography workshop that was conducted at UCLA and it was great…and at a great price. It was valued at $450, but I found it on Groupon for $59 AND I actually learned some things about my camera. It was a great, productive and long day. I even booked out with my agents for it.

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Audition: “US Bank” @ Ross Lacy Casting. Good audition and for another session director that I usually feel pressure to do well for…I think I accomplished that.

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This afternoon I took a surfing lesson in Santa Monica that I found on Groupon. Although I had issue with the business practices of the company with changes the terms of the deal I had a good time. It was a great couple of hours of vigorous activity…I might do it again.

My agency called with an appointment for THE MENTALIST for next week…almost a week in advance. Cool.

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Audition/Tape: “Law & Order: Los Angeles” @ Megan Branman Casting. I felt good about this one; it’ll probably be cast from tape. It is the type of role that I go in for quite often.

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Callback: “Xerox” @ Kathy Knowles Casting. This was another callback with director David Shane who I booked the KY BRAND commercial through. He wasn’t in the room with us, but on the video monitor in New York. I think it went okay; he is so SO specific in what he wants from actors and very nice at the same time. Glad he continues to bring me to callbacks as I hope to work with him again in the near future.

Audition: “Degree” @ Spot Casting. Great audition; fun spot. I would LOVE to book this one. For some reason I think it might be for the Super Bowl, but I don’t know…and it doesn’t matter. I’d just like to get called back at this point.

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Audition/Tape “Mr. Sunshine” @ Lauren Gray Casting. This was my first time meeting Lauren and she really seems like a nice lady. She was surprised to read on my resume that I had never had alcohol or coffee in my life. The read was fun and I hope it leads to a booking or more opportunities during this TV season and beyond.

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Audition: “Xerox” @ Kathy Knowles Casting. This was fun and I always feel great when I do well for this particular session director. He really knows what he needs to get from an actor. I’m not always able to deliver, but today I did and that is a victory for me.

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Callback: “cars.com” @ Spot Casting. I was very happy with my performance on this one. The creative team seemed much more interested in the other actor for the other role, but I couldn’t do anything about that. I was very happy with what I did in the room.

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Audition: “SoCal Honda” @ Alyson Horn Casting. I think I did okay on this one, but I felt kinda stiff…which happens more often that I’d like.

This afternoon I went to Dorsey High School to participate with a group of actors to read the scripts of at-risk students. As usual, it was a great experience and I always thrilled to be able to give back to the community.

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Audition: “US Cellular” @ Ross Lacy Casting. This was quick and simple; just a few questions about things we enjoy.

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Do you ever wonder what the heck you’re doing? Professionally, personally or just generally in life? I do; always have. Not so much in the sense of not being sure, but I constantly wonder about other things. Most everything.

Recently, at my night job, I shared with a fellow employee that I couldn’t understand why I wasn’t depressed about my circumstances. At least I don’t think I’m depressed. I’m talking personally, financially, socially, my family situation, etc. Nothing really outrageous, just things that many of us deal with in our lives. It’s confusing because I use different coping methods to make a given situation work for me. Yes, a bit of it is denial; actually a lot of it is denial. I’ve never been anyone else in this life so I don’t have anything to compare it to.

Part of the headtrip is that I have so much to look forward to while I live with the challenges. The night job is a beast…to say the least. Not sure how long my body can’t take it…or my mind for that matter. So I go to my safe place. Which is to make a challenging situation work for me. I’ve tried to get the most out of it so that I can make the good parts out weigh the tougher aspects of doing it. It’s been 2 ½ years and I think I’m winning the battle and in a big way. I just can’t let the areas of success cloud the pursuing of my career.

Sure, sometimes things are tough at the night job, but as many of us know, dealing with the public can be difficult. At the same time it can be wonderful and the amount of talent that I’m surrounded by is incredible. Also, I’ve developed some really cool relationships with many of my co-workers. Some of it is just light and fun, but other times it’s more life stuff. One of the greatest parts for me is that I get to encourage younger people to develop a healthy relationship with their finances. Now, I’m not trained in that field or anything like that, but I’m an expert on how I, myself, have become a super-saver. It’s a great feeling when one of them asks a question about it or tell me how they have decided to pay off a credit card or join the company 401(k) plan. I explain to them that the greatest thing I will ever be able to do for them is to encourage them to be responsible with their finances and, of course, treat them with respect.

I think the main reason why I’m able to get through to them is that I can talk to them in a way that I know they can understand. I sure wish I had someone in my life to do that for me at that age. My father tried to do that the best way he knew how, but he had no idea how to really get through to a teenager…no idea at all. Or maybe he just couldn’t through to me. It wasn’t like I was a difficult kid or anything like; we just never had any kind of meaningful father/son connection. I haven’t seen or spoken to him for years and I think about how much of a difference he could have made for me…and I for him. I think, subconsciously, I’m trying to do for them what didn’t happen for me. That might be a little weird, but my heart is in the right place and they seem to be receiving it well.

So no, I don’t think I’m depressed or being less than real with myself; I’m just really optimistic about my future. I have visions of working with my brothers in business. Now THAT will be cool. Actually, just last month, one of my younger brothers and I started saving money together to invest in the future. Those investments could be commercial property, residential property, stocks, etc. I am really excited about it and it’s given me something outside of acting that I’m totally into. I’m doing a lot right, but there is still much work to do.

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I attended a free workshop with a script consultant today. I’m trying to re-ignite the energy and focus to finish my romantic comedy script. It was a great thing to have done and she and the other two women who attended were very helpful and encouraging. They recommended a few books that I’m going to look into hopeful get on track and writing again. Yes! That would be great.

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Audition: “Wendy’s” @ ASG Casting. I had a complete blast in this audition with a great partner to work off of. In the details for the audition they asked that we be “clean-shaven”. At first I didn’t pay too much attention to that note, but later said to myself “why not?” I’m not on avail for anything else at the moment and if this will give me an edge it only makes sense to do it. I booked a “Wendy’s” spot years ago when I was based in New York and got to travel first-class to Miami, stay in a 5-star hotel and earned a nice payday along the way. Actually, it saved my butt from living in my car when I first arrived in LA…not really, but it helped me out a lot. Maybe lightning can strike again!

Audition: “cars.com” @ Spot Casting. This went well too. I’m still being paid for the “cars.com” commercial I did for this years Superbowl. Funny enough, even though it hasn’t really aired all that much I’ve made much more money than I thought I would. They should hire me again. I can do it!

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Today, I spent several hours shooting photos of my friend, actress, writer, producer Hazel Dean. It was fun and I think I learned a little bit more about photography.

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Audition/Tape: “Svetlana” @ Lauren & Jordan Bass Casting. Wow, I have no freaking idea how this one went. It wasn’t scripted. We just did an improv; I had fun and wanted it to go longer, LOL! It seemed before I knew it I was in the car! Again, I don’t know what happened in the room, but I had fun and would have loved to see where the improv would have gone.

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After a busy, draining day of driving yesterday I slept soundly last night and woke up late this morning to the sound of…rain. Lots of rain. In fact, it was raining cats & dogs, East Coast-style! A feeling immediately came over me that I had to get out in the street and do my photo drops…especially today, especially in the rain.

I look at a rainy day of doing drops in LA as like a bonus; a day where the average person is going to stay home…because it’s raining. The thing about that way of thinking is that it usually garners average results, and average results, particularly in this business, is NOT where I want to be. So I have to do more than most…and on a consistent basis. I admit that it’s an energy-draining proposition, but what else can I do but stay engaged in the game if I’m going to play the game.

Amazingly, I had one of my most successful days in the field. I completed my entire list for the day. That does not always happen. It felt great to feel like I was helping myself and my team to move forward; now I need to book some of these jobs that I get appointments for!

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Geez, TGIM! Yeah, Thank God it’s Monday. Why do I say that? Because my “Monday” is like a normal person’s Saturday. I’m tired. After working 5 overnight/graveyard shifts in a row, for who knows how many weeks back-to-back, I’m in need of some downtime. So I get home around 5:30 am, talk to my little brother back in Virginia and get in the bed around 6am in an attempt to catch up on the weeks’ sleep…which rarely works.

See, the thing is that I don’t really have a “weekend”. My “night job/server/Sunset Blvd babysitter” weekend is Monday/Tuesday and my acting weekend is Saturday/Sunday. Often times I feel like as though I’m on-call 24 hours a day. Plus, sometimes I have employee meetings on my day off and weekend auditions.

I’m often asked, “How I do it”. At times, I ask myself the same thing.

Honestly, I’m not sure how I do it and/or have done it for such a long time. My body isn’t sure either. The physical toll it takes on me is evident…mentally and socially too. Part of me has to live in a state of denial and associate certain things with certain things. Another part of me feels that it’s highly unlikely that I can work as hard and as smart as I have for as long as I have and not get to where I’m trying to get to.

What keeps me going? For one thing I still have a burning desire to act professionally…I love being on-set. Another thing is that I feel like I am “right there” at the point where real career building jobs will fill my resume. Still, another reason is that I’ve come a long way from Virginia Beach and it just makes sense to continue on the journey. I'm not at all complaining or even venting; I'm just talking about my situation. I'm quite fortunate to have two jobs that I earn money at.

I mentioned a few weeks ago that I was offered a promotion at the night gig, but after seriously considering it for a week or so I respectfully declined the offer. It would have included a bump in pay, but I’m just not prepared to take on the extra responsibility. I also didn’t want to accept the position and have it put me over the “tipping point” of my sanity…it’s such a tough job. Not tough like digging ditches, but tough nonetheless. The greatest part of the whole thing is that I put myself in a position to being able to decline the offer. I’ve used the job to place myself in the driver’s seat vs. the passenger position and THAT feels great. Three years ago I might have HAD to accept the position.

CUT TO: 10:33 this morning, I’m in a deep sleep – Phone ringing.

It’s my commercial agency. I let the call go to voicemail, but right away it’s ringing again. It must be a same-day call so I answer it. Sure enough, it’s a callback for 12 noon, in 87 minutes in Santa Monica. I was so tempted to roll over and grab just 5 more minutes of rest, but I thought better of it and got up, in the shower and on my way.

When I got in the room I immediately recognized the director, David Shane. He directed the “KY Brand” commercial I did in New York last year…unfortunately it never ran, but it was still not a bad financial experience, plus I got a trip to New York out of the deal. The audition went well so we’ll see what happens.

After the audition, and since I was way out in Santa Monica, I figured I might as well drop-off some photos…even though I really wanted to go back to sleep. Gotta keep on…keeping on.

This is where something really inspiring happened. I stopped by one place on my list and there was an empty drop-off box. I didn’t want to put my headshot in there because it was raining a little and the box didn’t look active to me. So, I paused, and then opened the door to the office not knowing what I would find. I knew whom I might see because I knew who the casting associate was, but you never know what might happen. My style of drops is to stick and move, but I’m extremely calculating at the same time.

When I opened the door, I saw, at the very back of the office the associate in question. I waved and just said I wanted to drop a photo for their files and she politely motioned that she was on the phone. With that, I was on my way…I’m always careful to not be a burden while being a pleasure to deal with.

Twenty minutes later I received an email on my phone from her and it read:

====

hi nice to see you for a moment today

sorry i couldn’t come say hi

we cast the role in XXXXX but i will hang on to your pic for future stuff

signed XXXXX

====

Actually, I didn’t even know there was a role I was right for in the project. I was just doing a general drop-off to remind them that I’m still here, available and ready to work on whatever they are casting

It was such a boost to validate all of the effort it takes to drive around this city for as many years as I have. That includes countless miles, hours, photos and a few parking tickets along the way beginning in August ‘98. This same associate, years ago, as an assistant at a different office, received my postcard, called me in and booked me on a popular dramedy a few years after arriving from New York!

There has been a lot of question of whether or not it’s worth to do drop-offs; especially the way the casting process has changed. I think it’s worth it.

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Audition: “Sprint” @ Joe Blake Casting. My agent woke me up with this same-day call. It went great! I went in the room and didn’t feel all that prepared, but I threw all that “baggage” away and had fun.

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Audition/Producer/Tape: “Raising Hope” @ Dava Waite Casting. I was really happy with how this one went. I felt like I had a hold on the character and I did what I set out to do. Can’t ask for much more than that…well, yes I can but; this is a great start. Actually, I have a little history with Dava’s office. She called me in for CBS sitcom, “Yes, Dear”, years ago; I didn’t book the role, but a few episodes later they called and offered me a role. I really appreciated that. Can lightning strike again? I think so.

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Audition: ”XXXXX” @ Xxxxx Xxxxx Casting. I signed a non-disclosure agreement for this one…so I guess it didn’t really happen.

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Audition: “McDonald’s” @ Cathi Carlton Casting. Good stuff; pretty simple. It was one of the type of auditions I don’t normally excel in.

Callback: “Alka-Seltzer Plus” @ Francene Selkirk Casting. I had a great feeling that I was going to get a callback for this one. The callback itself? I think it went okay, but there was a little blocking change that I wasn’t told about before the first take and it might have made me look like I didn’t know what I was doing, but I did it the same way as the first audition…oh well. You never know.

Audition: “Comcast” @ Alyson Horn Casting. This went well. I am so thankful that I get brought to this very important office on such a regular basis. It’s been a long time since I’ve booked here, but she must believe in me because there are many other actors she could call in my place.

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Happy Anniversary to me! 17 years ago, on Wednesday September 22nd 1993 @ 7:30pm in Virginia Beach, VA I took my first acting class and embarked on a very, VERY interesting and difficult journey. Sometimes, oftentimes, I think a lot has happened in those 6209 days, other times, occasionally, I'm not so sure.

Hold up! Of course I’m sure! I just don’t think about it in those terms on a regular, basis. So I’m going to take a moment, and revisit some of the experiences I’ve had as a professional performer. I hope it doesn’t come off as me being full of myself…here it goes:

Member of the Screen Actor’s Guild (SAG).

Had the same, effective theatrical & commercial representation for 12+ years.

Had my first audition in Los Angeles just 12 hours after arriving from New York.

Had 3 commercial auditions and 3 callbacks my first week in Los Angeles.

Had a period of 7 years that I solely made a living & filed taxes as an actor…took vacations too!

Have traveled to Washington, DC, Miami, New York, Japan & Spain as a performer.

Booked a national commercial and was “unbooked” just before the fitting.

Have performed onstage at the Kennedy Center.

Was cast in Ocean’s Twelve by director Steven Soderbergh & CD Debra Zane, but the scene was cut before filming.

Was also cast in Ocean’s Thirteen by director Steven Soderbergh & CD Debra Zane, but this time had to pull out the film, and a scene with Al Pacino, because of a commercial booking…I was later edited out of the commercial.

Have worked with several directors who are very highly regarded in their field – Film, Steven Spielberg. TV Comedy James Burrows. Commercials, Joe Pytka.

Have qualified for Health benefits every year since becoming a member of SAG.

Have become a vested member of SAG which awards me with a pension at retirement.

Have been featured on the cover of Backstage magazine.

Have been featured on National Public Radio (NPR) in a piece on the casting process with Casting Director Debra Zane.

Have been featured in “Self-Management for Actors: Getting Down to (Show) Business” By Bonnie Gillespie & “Acting Q’s: Conversations with Working Actors” also by Bonnie Gillespie & Actor/Author Blake Robbins.

Have learned a lot about how the casting process work…maybe too much.

I moved to New York with $200 in my pocket, no job…shared a bed in the Hell’s Kitchen area of Manhattan…with a guy…for 4 months.

Have been featured on the Wrigley’s Jumbotron in New York’s Times Square.

Have been interviewed on the New York-based EverythingActingPodcast.

…umm. I just got “wide-open” with the “me” stuff. On the one hand I feel like I should apologize for laying it on so thick, but on the other hand “it is what it is”…it’s all true and verifiable. Plus, I’m really proud of what I’ve accomplished in a notoriously difficult business. No, I’m not exactly where I want to be in my acting career, especially the working in a restaurant part, but I’ve usually been able to make the best of most situations I’ve found myself in.

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Lately, I’ve been dropping off my headshots around town like a mad man. Why? I gotta get “this thing” in motion. What “Thing?” My career. That’s what “Thing”. I HAVE to make it happen and move to the next level in my acting journey. For me, the major way of doing that is to hustle…get out of the house and participate in my success. Back to the drop-offs. I’ve always heard actors talk about the “many reasons” why dropping off photos is a waste of time or that it’s no longer effective. Usually, there doesn’t seem to be any concrete reason why they say what they do, but I definitely have concrete reason as to why I say otherwise.

Hustle: Anything I’ve ever accomplished has been because of that…I can’t stop now. Have photos; will drop them.

Audition: “Better With You” @ GO Casting. This came directly from a drop-off yesterday. How can I be sure? They told me.

Audition: “VW” @ Kathy Knowles Casting. Yeah, good one in the can. I have a pretty good track record at this office.

Audition: “Alka-Seltzer Plus” @ Francene Selkirk Casting. Yes! This went really, really well. While in company of my scene partner I felt I was in the presence of a real talent. That woman was a pleasure to watch. I hope both of us will be at callback in a few days.

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Work, work and more work it seems is the order of many of my days of late. I’m not complaining; I’m just sayin’. I think it’s better than not having enough work opportunities to make a living. Speaking of work, after the monthly employee meeting for my night job I received a text message, directly from casting director Dori Zuckerman, asking if I had a current wireless conflict. If not, she was offering me a time slot to audition for AT&T later in the afternoon. It was a great surprise, but not shocking.

I met Dori about 10 years ago in a casting director workshop and have worked for her as a reader countless times over the years. I’ve even booked a few jobs with her and learned a bunch about the casting process.

Audition: “AT&T” @ Dori Zuckerman Casting. The audition went great and I had a wonderful conversation with my scene partner afterwards.

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Audition: “LVCVA” @ Kathy Knowles Casting. This was quite the lively situation…and fun. Big ole group thing.

Callback: “The Whole Truth” @ Shaner/Testa Casting. Yep, me as a judge. I think this went well. The writer/producer/director, not sure exactly who the beautiful woman was, but she was very nice to me and thanked me for coming back in to read for the role. She’s probably nice to everyone…not just me. She sure did have a great smile

Anyway, I didn’t have any questions about the character and went right into the first read. I got a little bit of direction and read it once more. All seemed very happy with the performance, including me, and I was on my way.

This caps a week of 8 auditions and several graveyard shifts…I’m exhausted, but not complaining. The only thing is that I didn’t get too many drop-offs done this week. I did quite a few the week before and I’d like to think that some of that ground-level hustle had to do with the busy week I just finished. Who knows; I’ll take it however it comes.

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Audition/Producers/Tape: “The Whole Truth” @ Shaner/Testa Casting. I think I’m really right for this one and I was happy with how everything went in the room. I read it once, got some direction and did it again. I would LOVE to book this role. I’d even have to join AFTRA to do the role…don’t get me started on 2 unions for the same acting work.

Less than an hour later my agent calls with a callback! YES! But for another, smaller role. Huh? Yup, and get this? It’s for the role of a judge. Really? Yup, really. I kinda don’t see myself as a judge, but it really REALLY doesn’t matter what I think. It matters what the buyers think.

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Audition: “xxx” @ Xxxxx Xxxxxxx Xxxxxxxxx. This didn’t happen, but the confidentiality agreement I signed did.

Audition: “Target” @ Ross Lacy Casting. This is a spot for the upcoming Christmas season. Lots of underplaying for the feature director that is directing this commercial.

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Audition: “NCIS” @ Susan Bluestein Casting. Yes! I’ve been trying to get into this office for years. The audition consisted of two short scenes and although I wish I would’ve read the second scene again, just to clean up the dialogue a bit, I was very happy with the outcome. I hope I’ve opened the door to a long-term relationship with this office.

In a new development at my night job I've been offered a promotion, a small promotion, but a promotion nonetheless. I'm not sure if I'm going to accept or not...gonna take some time to weigh the pros and cons.

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Audition: “The Defenders” @ Felicia Fasano Casting. I have been trying to get into this office for years with no success, but finally it happened today. Not sure if it had anything to do with the general drop off of my photo last week, but I’ll take it any way I can get it. It’s been incredibly quiet from me lately, especially theatrically.

The role I went in for was that of the Master, the Legend…Sammy Davis, Jr. Yeah right. I mean, I don’t how know much I look like him, but I’d guess we are/were of similar stature and build. Dancing skills? Me a close 2^nd. Nah, not really. Singing skills? I’m right there…hmmm, not even close. Me drinking on stage with cigar in one hand and a gin martini in the other? Now you’re talking! Few can drink and smoke like me.

The cool part was that, in the description, it specifically said that the role did NOT have to be an impersonator, just an actor who resembled him. Cool. So I did some research on him over the weekend and Sammy was a bad dude for real. Massive talent. Going in I felt fine because it wasn’t like I had to dance or anything.

Of course, as soon as I got there the dialogue had completely changed. It wasn’t a whole lot to begin with so the change was no problem. I go in and the first thing I’m asked is if I’ve ever “done Sammy”, LOL! “Oh Sh*t!, I’m thinking, but I didn’t trip on it. I just gave her what I had…which wasn’t enough. She gave me some direction and I did it again. I think she wanted me to “be him” because my look was in the ball park, but she said “Nah, you’re not Sammy and I’ve got real impersonators coming in. But you’re a good actor; I’m pulling your photo and I’m going to get you back in here for something good.” Then she said, “Sorry.” I replied, “No, this is great, thank you.” And I walked out feeling really good about myself. I have to add that I smiled to myself when she turned my resume over. Why? Because I know exactly what’s on it.

So I have to stay out in the street; keep dropping photos, keeping trying to get more rest, keep trying to not let my other gig get the best of me and keep believing that I can continue to move forward in this career...and build my other one.

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Wow, I got a very unexpected residual check today for the www.cars.com commercial. Perfect timing because I’m in the market for a new Windows laptop.

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Audition: “Petco” @ Ross Lacy Casting. Nice! This went great!

Wow, what a surprise! I got a holding fee for the Healthy Choice/Marie Callendar’s commercial today. It wasn’t a huge check, but it completely paid for the computer I bought today. I ended up getting an eMachines desktop instead of a laptop and I spent less than I had planned. I’m also going to reinstall the OS on my Macbook so that it will run faster. All that will help me run a smoother operation and get out in the street to make things happen again.

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Wow, I got a very unexpected residual check today for the www.cars.com commercial. Perfect timing because I’m in the market for a new Windows laptop.

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Ugh! I had a feeling this was going to happen. Why do I say that? Because I think it’s official that the Marie Callendar’s/Healthy Choice commercial I booked and shot back in early March is not going to go beyond the test marketing phase. I knew there was a chance of that from the beginning, but you hope for the best…and I still am. The possible use of the campaign was as follows:

Rate: Scale. Option for foreign, theatrical, industrial, dealer, simulcast, internet and new media at SAG minimum***

Run/Usage: Test Market (probably 1 to 2 cycles as wildspot) prior to roll out Nationally***

I guess that means the campaign didn’t test as they had hoped? I don’t know, but I saw another spot for Healthy Choice/Marie Callendar’s that was very similar to the one I was in. I haven’t had the best of luck in recent years commercially; not sure why. That’s just the cycle of things and my cycle of things hasn’t been all that favorable, but I keep moving in a positive direction. It seems that if there is some way, any way, for a booking to not end up the way any actor would hope; that way finds its journey into my life. This is run down of what the most recent commercial bookings I’ve have booked have gone:

MICHELIN TIRES – October ’06 - I had to pull out of OCEAN’S THIRTEEN and a scene with Al Pacino to do this one. In the end my scene was edited out of the commercial.

WaMu – December ’07 – Multi-day shoot and a great, national airing for a couple of months.

CHEETOS – September ’08 – A few days after being booked and just before I was going to the fitting I received a call informing that my booking had been cancelled.

KY BRAND – March ’09 – I flew to New York to shoot this one. After receiving holding fees for a year the commercial never aired.

CARS.COM – December ’09 – While it was great that this was a commercial for Super Bowl; those spots don’t always continue to run after the big game. To my knowledge, they only aired it on TV once, but I’ve made a nice amount of money through other ways the client bought it.

MARIE CALLENDAR’S/HEALTHY CHOICE – March ’10 – My commercial was one of a 6-spot campaign, but it appears they cancelled the entire thing and filmed new ones.

Oh well. What can you do? Good question. What I do is realize that it’s a great “problem” to have. It’s much better than to not have booked them at all. This cycle, if that’s what it is, will change into something more favorable I’m sure. In due time; I just have to keep my head in the game.

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Callback: “USPS” @ Francene Selkirk Casting. It’s been 2 full weeks since my last audition. I HAVE to get on the grind or my career will be in the past. That can’t happen. I’m a professional actor and I need to act professionally.

The callback went okay; not sure I gave to the director what he was asking for. It went really well in the first audition so we’ll see what happens.

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hmm…another week with no appointments…at all. I would think that things would be picking up for me, but it doesn’t seem like it. I’m sure commercials will come back around, but theatrically, I have to stay on the ball. There is so much “trickle down” going with actors from a higher tier being willing to do work that they wouldn’t have taken in years past.

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Audition: “USPS” @ Francene Selkirk Casting. This went great and I think I’m right for it. This is where I had my very first commercial audition in Los Angeles…12 years and 15 days ago. I’ve had many callbacks and avails, but haven’t yet booked. One day I will.

Audition: “Nationwide Insurance” @ Lisa Fields Casting. This came in as a same day call from my agent and also went well.

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Callback: “Jack-in-the-Box” @ Alyson Horn Casting. Yes! Finally a callback for something. This was the appointment I had last week that I totally could not get it together. Fortunately, the session director was quite patient with me and got me to where I needed to be to shine on the tape. I guess it worked because I don’t think there was any way I would have gotten to round two.

It went well; who knows if I’ll book or even get placed on avail, but I do know that it felt good in the room. Alyson always calls me in for this client and I believe I’m right for these spots in particular; so eventually I should score some points with a booking.

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Audition: “Ford” @ Liz Paulson Casting. Eh, this went okay. Kind of caught me by surprise. In hindsight, I think me and my group would have been better off playing it smaller…but who knows.

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Audition: “Jack-in-the-Box” @ Alyson Horn Casting. Ooops! Not so much on this one. I was having trouble getting the dialogue out of my mouth…so was my partner. Thankfully, the session director was super patient with both of us and I think we put good stuff on the tape in the end.

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Audition: “Wells Fargo” Skirts Casting. Yes! Good stuff here and I think I’m right enough for it. Very happy with how it went.

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This morning, after working all night, I drove to Manhattan Beach to…Adopt-A-Kid-For a Day. Yeah, it’s something I’ve wanted to do for a while and I finally stepped up to the plate. It was a great day and a great way to give a little back. I really want to be a part of the solution. I mean that in general in many aspects of my life. No, I’m not perfect, but I aspire to be one of the people who care about humanity…like my mother.

I was paired with a 7 year-old and his 8 year-old friend along with another mentor. We got in the water with them, taught them how to fly a kite, participated in a 3-legged race, etc. It was wonderful experience and something I’m sure I’ll do again in the future.

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Check this out! I went surfing today! Yup, sure did. AND paddle into, caught, and stood up on the very first wave I attempted to catch. I hooked up with a few people at work and had a blast. I think it might be something I want to do on a more consistent basis and it’s much more fun than going to the gym…although I need to go to the gym to be able to do it. It wore my a** out!

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Audition: “Charter Communications” @ Ross Lacy Casting. Can we just skip to the callback already??? It’s been since forever it seems.

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Audition: “Cox Communications” @ Michael Sanford Casting. I really like Michael Sanford; he’s just seems like a super nice guy, but I hate trying to park near his office in Hollywood, lol!

Anyway, the audition the audition went fine…neither here nor there.

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Time for my yearly comprehensive physical examination. I’m fortunate to have qualified for SAG medical coverage, consistently for the past 12+ years. It gives me a feeling of accomplishment in my acting career that can sometimes slip away in the day-to-day journey…especially when I’m asking someone how they want their burger cooked at 4 in the morning…

Anyway, I appear to be in pretty great shape according to my results. I’m definitely getting a little banged up by the night job, but I’m fortunate and making it work for me the best I can. I’ve even started to hit the gym again…I’ve been told that the gym is a good thing, LOL!

Oh yeah, there HAS to be a better way to perform a prostate exam. If you haven’t had one…it sucks. No, really it does.

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Audition/Tape: “Chuck” @ Patrick Rush Casting. This office has cast me twice in the past and I am way overdue for a third one, but I don’t think it’s going to be this one. I wasn’t terrible, but I don’t think I nailed it either…not happy about that. I haven’t had many TV/Film appointments lately and I have to make each and every one count.

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Audition: “Bank of America” @ Ross Lacy Casting. This was quick-fast, pretty simple…how about let’s book something?

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Callback: “McDonald’s” @ Kathy Knowles Casting. Yes! I left feeling really good about this one. I think the director and I had a real connection. Of course, the director doesn’t usually make the final decision…at least not alone, but I felt it was a start. Who the heck knows with these things?

I also finally got my birthday present today…my new iPhone4! I must admit that I am soo excited. My current phone is being retired for one that, hopefully, works better.

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Audition: “Target” @ Davis/Baddeley Casting. This was a blast; I even had a girlfriend in the scene. Imagine that! Hopefully, I’ll get a callback. I think it might be a holiday spot.

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Audition: “McDonald’s” @ Kathy Knowles Casting. Good time, good actors; hopefully I’ll get a callback. While I was waiting to audition a woman came in who I thought I recognized, but I couldn’t figure out from where. We happened to be in the same group and when she slated her name it came to me. We had worked on “CSI” together almost 10 years ago!

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It’s my birthday! I have always kept my birthday a low-key affair. Part of the reason is that I’ve always looked a bit younger than I actually am and it usually draws attention to that fact. Another reason is that I have a serious fear of rejection. I have always feared that if I tried to have a birthday party nobody would show up. Same thing with Christmas; I never ask for gifts for Christmas.

What I thought I was going to do was to go to Olive Garden, alone, for dinner (I like the breadsticks) and buy the new iPhone 4 (it’s on order). That isn’t what happened. One of my co-workers at the night job sent me a text, wished me a Happy Birthday, said we’re getting wasted and sent a text to the whole staff at work to inform them of the fact. Needless to say I was freaking nervous…I’d never had any type of birthday gathering.

I have to say it was a great time and very interesting to watch through my sober eyes. Sure, I’ve been to plenty of gatherings and watched people morph from normal guy/gal to “who IS that?” This was different because this particular gathering was being held in my honor and for some reason I felt a certain amount of responsibility to keep things in check. Yeah, there was some broken glass, but nothing crazy or insane. I know I wasn’t supposed to, but I slipped the waitress an extra tip…I know how great that feels when someone does that for me when I’m waiting tables.

It would have been even cooler if I was a drinker, but I’m just not. I hated cheating my friends out of the joy of “THIS GUY NEEDS A DRINK!” or “WE’RE DOING SHOTS!” To replace the void of me not drinking I smoked a few cigarettes instead. My goal was to feel crappy in the morning…like I had partied like a rockstar. So I smoked a brown thingy by Nat Sherman and a Parliament Light. Neither of them left too much of an after taste, but I did get a little light-headed.

Later a group of us hung out at a co-workers apartment while they played music that was waaay too loud at 3:30 in the morning. Then we headed to another friends apartment for more music. I finally got home about 5:30am. I was partied out. I hope I can wake up for my 11:30 commercial audition in a few hours. I had a great time.

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Audition: “Church’s Fried Chicken” @ Gabrielle Schary Casting. Having a great time in an audition is always a great thing. It doesn’t mean I’ll get a callback, but I think it’s good start.

This sides were in English & Spanish and the session director asked me if I spoke Spanish, “No” I replied. But then, when I slated my name on camera, I gave him my alter-ego from my night job – Hector-Jesus de la Cruz…the son of Fernando de la Cruz Espinoza Nunez, Junor… My partner and the session director started laughing and complimented me on my accent. It was a risk. The audition went well and hopefully, I’ll get a callback.

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Audition “Cell South” @ Maryclaire Sweeters Casting. Yay! This went well and the session director was the same woman who ran the session for the last commercial that I booked. I had a chance to thank her for being so patient and helping me through the audition which led to the callback and eventual booking.

Audition “Cox” @ ASG Casting. This went pretty well also; although I might be little young for it. We’ll see.

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Two auditions. Same casting facility. Same product. Different casting offices. Two different times = 2 separate trips and that makes for a very long day after a long shift at the night job last night. But hey! I had 2 auditions!

Audition: “AT&T” @ Ross Lacy Casting. This was quick and fast; just a mini interview and it went well.

Audition: “AT&T” @ Spot Casting. This one was quick/fast too. Callbacks next week.

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Audition: “Kibbles ‘N Bits” @ Ross Lacy Casting. This was simple and fun and I would LOVE to work with a dog in a commercial.

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Audition: “Amex” @ Shane Casting. This was fun and simple; although I think I might be a bit young…I’m sure that’s my own personal baggage though.

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I am not writing about the audition that I didn’t have to today. Why? Because I signed a non-disclosure form that I wouldn’t…but I felt good about it. Hopefully, I’ll get a callback.

I saw “Sex and the City 2” a few days ago. I had never seen an episode of the TV series or the first film, but I enjoyed the one I saw today much more than I thought I would. It was quite entertaining and can only imagine how funny the series was.

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Audition/Producers: “DGI” @ ASG Casting. Usually when I go to this production company, Tool, in Santa Monica it’s a bit of a madhouse, but this time it was very mellow. I think this particular role was added at the last minute so they were bringing actors straight to the director.

While I was rehearsing the dialogue a man walked up to me and said, “I have a good feeling about you”. I replied that, “I have a good feeling about me too!” He asked me if I had some good dance moves and I told him I did. Truthfully, I’m not a dancer at all…or even all that rhythmically inclined. He then told me he was one of the producers, but didn’t want to get in my head…thanks, lol!

It was a silly spot that I felt silly about doing because, yes, I was in my head about the dancing…but had they cast me I would have done it…and cashed every check they sent!

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Audition: “Xerox” @ Kathy Knowles Casting. Ugh! I was terrible in this audition. Not sure why, but it was bad. Fortunately, the session director was patient with me. In the end I think we got two decent takes to send to the producers, but still…

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Audition/Tape/Producers: “iCarly” @ Krisha Bullock Casting. This went alright; I think I had a few good moments in the read…I have an underlying feeling about possibly working on an AFTRA show…I’m coming to terms with it though…I have to since many of the new pilots are AFTRA, but I’m going to keep chasing the remaining SAG shows that are left.

Another anniversary is upon me. What is it this time? Two years ago today I rejoined the workforce as something other than a professional actor…at the same job/place/position I’d left 7 years prior…yeah.

Happy anniversary to me.

How do I feel about this? Hmmm…good question. Well, on the one hand, of course, I’d rather be a series regular on a TV show or doing many more films and more commercials, but I’m doing what I need to do while I need to do it.

That being said; I have to say I’m handling it quite well. I am taking full advantage of having two jobs that I make money at. Sure, it can be quite exhausting, but some people are exhausted from looking for one job…I have two and they are both profitable.

In 2006, without question, the smartest thing I did was to enter my financial data into Quicken so I was able to see exactly where every dollar I had was going. In an instant I changed my relationship with money…for the better. I was never really bad with money; I always saved enough to be able to spend 6 weeks a year back home with family. BUT I was never really great with money either; I was just okay…like many of us. Being able to see the data on the computer in pie charts and graphs changed everything.

I have found that it’s much less about how much I earn; it’s much more about how much I don’t spend without knowing why I’m spending it. I have turned into an extreme saver.

Speaking of smart things…in 2008, without question, the smartest thing I did was to pick up a way to earn steady money in addition to acting. I tried a few things that didn’t pan out and ended up revisiting a place from my past. Admittedly, I had to find a way within myself to deal with it because I knew it could lead me to a nice-so-great place mentally.

So here I am, 2 years into the game, and it’s not…terrible. Actually, things are really good considering the reality of the situation. No, it’s not perfect, but the upside greatly outweighs the downside...by a long shot. I am making the best of what’s in front of me; while still creating a better future. I’m still making adjustments and trying to improve in other areas of my life, but I’d guess that is something that never really changes about most of us.

One thing, for sure, that working full-time has done is occupy my time. It’s also taken me away from constantly thinking about the business. THAT has been a great thing for me. Why? Because I have so many other interests outside of “the biz”. I’m even reading my second book this year! Imagine that! Two books in a year is monumental for me. I always read a lot; just not usually books. I’d read newspapers, magazine, online, etc., but not usually books….I was always envious of people who read books. This latest book was a gift from a friend written by Hill Harper and is titled “The Conversation: How Black Men and Women Can Build Loving, Trusting Relationships”. Kind of heavy huh? Well, it was recommended and I’ve always liked Hill Harper so I will at least give it a shot and try to get through it. I have a feeling it’ll be an easy read for me though. Thanks Frances.

As I mentioned earlier something else I’ve become really interested in is finance…my finances to be exact. I’m investing 20% of my pay into the company 401(k) program plus the percentage that the company matches and saving even more per month per month into a Roth IRA. Those vehicles for savings help to lower my taxes. I’m trying to position myself to buy a condo or house…maybe here in Los Angeles or home in Virginia Beach. I also would LOVE to get a newer car, but my ’98 Honda Accord with 152,654 miles runs just fine…and of course it’s paid for. So that wouldn’t be smart. I’ll have to settle for the iPhone 4G when it comes out.

Other good stuff is that I’ve earned enough to qualify for another year of SAG medical insurance and almost have the earnings required for a SAG pension credit.

So all in all, after 2 years, things are really good. I’m thankful for my employment and I’ve met some really good people that I work along side of. Will I be working there, slinging burgers ‘n Bud, in another 2 years? I don’t have the answer to that, but I do know that I expect to book many more acting jobs. Yeah, I’ve got something to offer that’s worth seeing.

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Audition: “FedEx” @ Ross Lacy Casting. This was fun! I worked with 2 other talented actor who, along with me, would be PERFECT in this spot, LOL! Hopefully we’ll all be at callbacks next week.

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Wow, 15 years ago today I arrived in New York City, Port Authority to be exact, with a pink duffel bag full of clothes and $205 in my pocket. Time sure does fly!

A lot has happened in that time, but I’m not at all finished; my journey is alive and well. I’m extremely excited about my future; somewhat excited about my current situation, but I have all the tools to continue being a success on a larger scale.

I smile when I look back to where I was a decade and a half ago and the fact that I’m still at it is a testament of something…sometimes I’m not sure what, but this career choice is not for the faint of heart.

I have risen from being one of many who arrive in New York & Los Angeles everyday to being one of relatively few who have earned a Screen Actors Guild Pension as a professional actor. I am very proud of that. I plan to build on the foundation I’ve built over the last 15 years and moved to a new level over the next 15 years and beyond…here I come!

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Wow! Guess who has an audition?! Me! I was beginning to think that my career was over and I’d had my last audition. It has been SO slow for me lately; I ain’t tripping though ‘cause I’ve been in the game long enough to know that it comes and goes – ebbs and flows.

Audition: “t-mobile” @ Spot Casting. Good stuff; quick in and out.

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