2nd Callback/Avail “KFC” @ Ross Lacy Casting. This 2nd callback went really, really well. I went in with a great group of guys, I took direction and had a lot of confidence, but for some reason I was kinda down when I left. I'm not sure what it was, but I felt the very familiar "you've been released" lurking closely around the corner. It's rare for me to feel that way. I mean I don't necessarily expect to book from an avail, but I don't take it personal and get too wrapped up in it either.

I guess it doesn't really matter since I left good stuff in the room. They don't have to know I was severely depressed on my way back to my car. THEY don't have to know I was calling my therapist for an emergency session to JUST GET THROUGH IT! THEY don't have to know I was looking at my wrist with a Swiss-Army knife in the other hand ready to CUT MY EFFING WRIST! THEY don't have to know it I went straight home, got into bed, curled up in a FETAL-POSITION with my thumb in my mouth! THEY don't have to know I looked at some of my extra Vicodin and was ready to END IT ALL DAMMIT!!

They don't have to know any of that. Why? Because it didn't happen and Vicodin is for pain. I think Prozac is the one I'm thinking of. Maybe for my next dental procedure I can talk the doc into some of that Prozac shit. Let me tell you, the ONLY reason none of that stuff happened is because I had to go home, change and rush to another audition. Without the annoyance of ANOTHER FREAKIN COMMERCIAL AUDITION you can bet I would have been home, naked, in a fetal-position, bleeding from the wrist, popping Vicodin every 10 minutes - convincing myself it was Prozac.

Audition: “Red Stripe Beer” @ Francene Selkirk Casting. This one went great. It was funny because they were waiting and waiting for an Asian guy to go in with this Asian woman who was there before me. Also, there wasn't a Black woman for me to go in with. So we both just had to wait, which wasn't a problem for me, but why? I'm thinking, are you kidding me it's freakin 2006?

Look, I don't know if the Asian woman was Japanese or not, but I do know that I've been to Tokyo and trust me, "it's all good" there is no problem with a Black man and an Asian woman having a little something in common - at least for a commercial audition. Sometimes the ad agency wants to see things a certain way I guess.