Audition: “State Farm” @ TLC/Booth Casting. This is a Joe Pytka-directed spot. It went well. Hopefully I’ll get a callback. He doesn’t usually have callbacks, but maybe that has changed. At any rate, I hope I’m there.
Today marks 10 years since I lost my mother, Louise Fuller, to pancreatic cancer. Wow. I miss her so much. I can only imagine what it would be like if she was still here. I cannot believe it’s been 10 years. I don’t know…I just shake my head and be thankful that’s she’s no longer suffering.
Audition: “Happy Endings”
@ Susan Vash Casting. Wow, my
first appointment in 3 weeks.
Susan remembered me and that’s always a good thing. The actual read was okay; I had a few
Wow. Yeah, that’s what’s on my mind. What does the future hold for me? Who the heck knows?
Sometimes that’s scary as heck and other times it’s stimulating. Today it’s a bit of both.
thinking about other things I can do with my life. This isn’t anything new; I’ve always had these thoughts, but
now I’m thinking about it in a more serious way. I think about how working at the restaurant has taken a toll
on me. Make no mistake it’s not
the worst thing in the world, far from it. I have, so far, made the best of it. But still. I’m less patient, more cynical, more empty…but also more
insightful, more patient with a better grasp on the Spanish language. Ugh… How many more tables?
How many more sides of Ranch dressing…I hate Ranch dressing…
I have so much
more to offer than what I do there.
So much more. I want to be
a part of something great. Or at
least something that aspires to be great.
Now THAT sounds like fun!
Not many things or operations aspire to be great. I’m ready to have more fun while I
work. That’s something I usually
get to do while acting, but I need to act more often…professionally.
I have to say I’m
quite proud that, even if I walked away today and never auditioned for another
commercial, TV or film project I could hold my head up high. I have something to show for my efforts. I cracked this really tough nut of
Hollywood. I just want more. I want more of a lot of things. I just have to figure out how to move
things to the next level. In my
career and in my life. I’m just
I mentioned that
super, duper, weird crazy experience with my father a few weeks ago. I haven’t heard anything else from
him. Of course I haven’t reached
out to him either. So maybe we are
both guilty. Maybe he’s more
guilty than me. Maybe that’s just
the way life goes sometimes. Who
knows; I think there is a good chance that we’ve spoken to each other for the
last time. What a waste. Are you serious??? He is supposed to be my father; the one
who brought me into this world. Wow, how empty. The
really odd thing is that out of all six children I am the one that is the most
like him. I began to think that
when I was in my late teens and I’ve been running from it ever since. Sometimes it is said one can become
what they are most afraid of…oops.
This morning I got a casting notice for a print
appointment…at least I thought I did.
Shortly afterwards I received messages informing me that it was actually
a glitch in the system at Casting Networks. Ouch! I thought
I was turning the corner in the print world, but I guess not…yet. This print thing is hurting me because
I finally invested money and shot photos specifically for the print market and,
so far, I’ve heard nothing but crickets. I got more appointments when I was using my regular
commercial headshots. What
gives? At least my agent is
responsive to the situation. She
says to give it a little more time and then will re-access. Okay, I will, but I feel strongly that
I can work in the print arena.