Audition: "IAMS" @ Ross Lacy Casting. Will I ever book for you again Ross? I sure hope so. You call me in more than anyone else and I can't seen to close the deal again. The audition today went pretty well, I think.

I was a bad boy in the waiting area. I saw a guy I hadn't seen in a long time and I was running my mouth and didn't fully read the storyboard. When I got in the room I wasn't sure what was going on. Actually, I think it worked in my favor because I totally committed to whatever it was I did. I was probably either really right or really wrong?

I have to say that I miss doing the show, although it's nice to have a break from going to the filthy downtown LA area. I am trying to get back on track with my drop-offs and the like. Running around during the day and rehearsing at night has definitely taken its toll on me. I'm exhausted. I need to get some rest and start fresh. I feel myself not getting things done, I have to find my center again. I really want to round out 2004 in a very strong way. I have to keep moving forward.

I find myself missing my mother often these days. It's hard not to think about what I was going through exactly two years ago. I was home in Virginia getting ready to go to Japan and my mom was slipping away. I was coming to the realization that she was, most likely, not going to survive. She was so happy that I was going that I thought for a moment that she was going to get better. They say its gets easier with time and it has, but when it hits me it hits like a ton of bricks. I feel like such a baby at times.